Saturday, December 25, 2010

Are we nagging others,since we are being nagged?

Recently I read an article about Nagging in the web news. Fault-finding; teasing; persistently annoying are being done by an individual on their spouse or their kids. Some say this happens because of the ego of the individual. Knowingly or unknowingly most of the individuals do this mistake of nagging.
Psychotherapists such as Edward S. Dean have reported that individuals who nag are often "weak, insecure, and fearful ... their nagging disguises a basic feeling of weakness and provides an illusion of power and superiority".  Psychologically, nagging can act to reinforce behavior. It was found in a study by the University of Florida that the main factors that lead a person to nag are differences in "gender, social distance, and social status and power".
Nagging can be found between both male and female spouses, though usually over different subjects. The husbands' nagging usually involves them finding "fault with their dinner, with the household bills, with the children, and with everything else", along with them "carrying home the worries of business."
Who stresses you out more, your spouse or your kids? A new report says spouses win hands-down. While it’s been well-documented that social ties can improve heart health, the worry often caused by family and friends can hurt you.

A study in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, performed by Dr. Rikke Lund at the University of Copenhagen, Denmark says that family stress can increase angina.  And in particular the closer you are to the person, the more damage they can do.
With the pressure of shopping, finances, and family get-togethers, nervous tension is especially on the rise during the holiday season. As most parents are running around trying to plan the perfect holiday, it’s a recipe for tension.
Interestingly according to the study, the more you care about the person, the more your health is affected: Since angina may be a risk for future heart disease, it makes sense to let things slide over the holidays, rather than allowing you to become stressed.
Does this study beckon the question, who are parents closer to: their spouse or their children? But perhaps moms and dads just don’t get as stressed out by their own kids because they are just that: kids. After all, when a spouse does something inconsiderate or ill-mannered, as an adult, they are held responsible. Kids, however, to a certain extent are released of that culpability.
On the contrary, the good news is that the less you care about someone, the smaller chance they have of risking your health. So eat, drink, and be merry this holiday season, and when the snide remarks surface from in-laws and/or acquaintances, just let them roll right of your shoulder…and away from your heart.
Is it that easy to advise or act on this?